The end. As incoherent and late as ever.

The end of the summer arrived somewhat stealthily, it sneaked onto the end of a week filled with stress and improvisation. It waved from the train as it shot past and before I knew it the bustle of background noise and undeniable evidence of habitation had faded and camp was once again a quiet forlorn place just waiting to be filled with life and passion and laughter and incredibly hard work. It also happened while I was reeling from an emotional snap-punch and by the time I was fully aware of which way was up the team had slipped off into the shadows, back to whatever they do the rest of the year.

It was profoundly heartbreaking to know most likely I'll never see some of them again. At the same time it also gives some contextual value to say that we weren't a collection of lost people (some of us are) looking for something to do for a few months, we were by and large an assortment of passionate servants who put our lives, our jobs, our friendships, relationships, families, and countless other things on hold for two months. 60 days to do a job, grow a team, and change our lives forever. 

Now, here I sit at nearly 120 days from the beginning of the summer. The summer has already slipped into the past, I can't even remember all of the things I wrote about through the course of this blog but I can easily say that I am a better person, a better man because of the two months I spent there. I always go into the summer expecting great things of those around me and I love seeing the growth that can happen in a child in 5 days. Despite this, I never fully expect the profound changes that happen in my own self each summer. On one hand I wish I could work camp year round, but at the same time it's useful to me to have the time to process what the summer was. What was it you may ask? I don't know... but I do know I'm more compassionate than I started out, I am aware and grieved by my own capacity to be petty and mean and being around an incredibly amount of incredible people on the move has inspired me to not be so comfortable where I'm at. 

I recently described where I'm at right now as standing on the top of a rocky column, cliffs all around me. As I look down in many different directions I'm kicking little pebbles off and trying to gauge how they're dropping. It's coming to the point where I'll be jumping... and as the summer has reminded me for a second year in a row, without jumping I wouldn't have two of the best seasons of my life. 

Coming soon to this space...

Do not fear audience that has long since moved on. I will bring the promised posts in the near future... but for now I must sleep.

Days 56-60 a retrospective.

If you're my 'regular' audience then you might have noticed that this post is chronically overdue. Due to that fact and me leaving you hanging near the end of the summer I'm going to do a (hopefully) brief post wrapping up the last week of camp and then later tonight or tomorrow (most likely tomorrow) I shall do a wrap up on the camp season as a whole.

So without any apology and with absolutely no further ado I'll just start writing things here.

Tuesday was a typical Tuesday.. it consisted of 3 trail rides and was only unusual in that it was the last Tuesday of the summer. Any formal acknowledgement of that fact by myself or any other staff members was greeted with loud and aggressive denials by others on staff. It was also a notable day for the fact that I took another nap after lunch, once again permitted by the 'beta' schedule that week and made necessary by the absolute exhaustion that had built up over the last few weeks. To put this in perspective... it was my 3rd nap of the summer, and the second of that week.

wednesday (day 57 if anyone was still counting) was lake day... annd my notes are a bit fuzzy by now so I'm sure it was a blast. I remember good times and I may have made a point of tracking down the few staff I hadn't dunked yet and go that part of the to do list completed. But I don't know that I'd admit to that under normal circumstances, whee for the internet and my propensity to ramble.

Thursday was a day that contains one of my favorite memories from camp. It also contained the bittersweet process of doing our activities for the last time that summer, the last time to saddle, the last time to get out and ride, the last time to unsaddle. In the context of camp or anything that you love so dearly it becomes very difficult to go through that process but at the same time I just had to keep telling myself that it's the first time for the kids... and it's not manly to cry.

The story I referenced happened during the counselor meeting, a group of kids ran up to me and said that they'd found a few expended shotgun shells on the edge of camp and wanted to see if we could go look for more. Now for some odd reason (what I now view as divine providence) I had an unusual amount of energy at just that moment in time so I decided it would be good to go hiking with the kids! Why not? it's thursday! and there are only 3 or 4 of em that want to right? So I agreed, only to find out we had about 10-15 kids that wanted to go... meh it's camp! lets have some fun eh? turns out we had a blast scampering over the rock face for almost an hour and found all sorts of interesting things. the only downside to the whole experience was that one kid slipped and stuck his hand on a cactus but then we got to hang out in the nurses office while he got all the spines pulled out.

Friday was the last day of camp and the first of the goodbyes... admittedly the most difficult part of the summer. I don't know what else to say at this point except that to all of you who were a part of the long road this summer... it was an honor.

I'll throw out a pair of posts tomorrow, one a wildly introspective end of the season return to the real-world thing, the other a more recent post about what's been going on in the camp world lately. Now that it has been promised... don't be particularly surprised if it is late.

Day 55. The last beginning of the summer.

Before I get into the details of today let me first say that as you might notice (or might not have until I said it) that I'm about a week behind... So for the next few days the details may or may not be entirely accurate. During camp I have a very weak connection to actual time passing.. so some things that I say happened on a certain day may or may not have happened on that day. They did happen at some point this week. 

That having been said... 

Monday began with training, there was just a few snippets left to get out of the way before the kids started arriving. It was also outlined that this week would be a bit different and all activities would be 2 hours long. This isn't a new thing for us down at the horses but it was a bit different for everyone else. The idea behind it is to free up time so the kids can more reliably be on time for activities. We'll see how it turns out.. but it seems like a good idea. 

The kids started arriving shortly before lunch and we had two rides head out in the afternoon. This week I had 2 guys helping me out and despite being 15 and 16 respectively they really did a great job with getting rides out and keeping the kids safe today. One of them has been with me all summer and continues to do a great job leading the line and helping with groundwork, and the other was totally new to our crew this week and helped interact with the kids. I've been very happy with my crew all summer long and this week appears to be no exception. 

Also another advantage to the slightly different schedule this week is that afternoon activities (and dinner) are half an hour later. The supreme advantage of this is that after lunch we actually get a wee break and today I used that window to take a short nap. I haven't had the need or time to take many naps at all this summer but I was so exhausted today that I just needed to stop for a moment. 

umm... I think that's it for monday... 

-Nick

Day 54. Sunday is a fun day?

Sunday morning began with the perhaps unwise decision to attend the early service at church (one we were only 10 minutes late for). I say unwise because it seemed logical that I could take a nap after church and before training (I did get one but it was only about 7 minutes).

After church we moved the heaviest television imaginable... Consider the character of atlas if you would... now replace the world with a television. That was this TV. After shifting the earth under the TV (it was easier than moving that stupid thing) we went to pizza! [take a wild guess who picked the place :)] From pizza we went and moved a refreshingly light couch to the same place as the TV... The crazy heavy tv that will make a fantastic door barricade should the zombies come.

From there it was back to camp for staff prayer and the beginning of another round of training. (which went fairly well). I don't know everyone's names this week... but I only lost my sanity once during the process, and it was quickly relocated.

After training it was sleepytime! yaay sleepytime! and thus began monday.

-Nick

Day 53. Saturday night's alright?

Saturday was a very chill day (so relaxed I even forgot to post)

The day began at about 7am... when our dear old camp grandpa greeted many people with his typical enthusiasm. The only problem with that is... he was doing it in the main hall which greatly amplified his already booming voice. Still you might be wondering why this is a problem... well... that main hall mentioned has a few rooms and such things that open into it. one of these rooms (seperated by a very much NOT soundproof wall) is the boys staff dorm. yep, you guessed it... the place I had been until just then been very happily sleeping.

I awoke but lacking the necessary motivation and social skills to see people (especially those whom were responsible for waking me up, or those who had encouraged it) I decided to read my book for a bit, and turns out that when I've got a chance I burn through good books... So not only have I finished with the name of the wind (which I mentioned earlier this summer) I have also finished book 2, the wise mans fear. Both good books and I highly recommend them to adult readers.

After finishing my book I ventured out into the now quiet main hall for some breakfast and discovered that at some point the population of camp had been reduced to myself, the Scottish brothers, the dreaded one, the lady of the dreaded one, and the child of the lady of the dreaded one. We were also joined by the mr. and mrs. captain before long, and at some point the parents of chaos and little chaos joined us as well. (the names have been slightly obscured to protect the innocent. and to amuse myself)

The day that followed was wonderfully unstructured and involved (in no particular order) shooting shotguns, mtn dew, good conversation, ham sandwiches, a nap, no less than 5 bowls of cereal, another good conversation, more mountain dew, a round of age of conquerors, and listening to the brave soundtrack.

it was great!

-Nick

Day 52. Of farewells and teamwork, of another job well done and catching up on blogs!

Friday, Friday, Friday!

The day began slowly and accelerated steadily until I just crashed. (more on that later)

Breakfast and such things happened at their allotted time but This day was slightly different so I was able to help serve breakfast (after quickly consuming a few biscuits myself). It was a good time and I was happy to be able to see the whole camp in that way, I've long said that If they could spare me at horses I'd be happy elsewhere and days like today reminded me of that. (not to say i'm not happy where I'm at)

The morning led into the normal cabin/camp cleaning frenzy but I managed to avoid that entirely by taking the two campers who hadn't ridden out on a quick trail ride. We had a chance to do some trotting and covered more ground than we normally do. It was a great time for us wranglers and the girls had fun helping saddle and unsaddle their own horses.

lunch was mac and cheese with hot dogs, a meal I have a soft spot in my heart for (and a soft layer around my belly because of) but it's always a 'the end is nigh' sort of moment when that meal happens. After lunch was a few all camp activities (ice cream ultimate, and the same water game we played during high school camp, minus the forts) The kids had a blast but I was so tired that I could barely walk... and thus I took a much needed nap. (my first all summer) until it was time for court.

Late afternoon the kids (and staff) participated in kangaroo court. The idea is simple, staff and campers are brought up on charges ranging from "conspiracy to dunk everyone at lake day" to "having too cheerful of a smile all the time" and so on and so forth. Punishments were meted out and were typically entertaining and slightly embarrassing. (although the good ones such as being too kind and whatnot were met with punishments such as being first in line for lunch etc.) It was a good time and seemed to be mostly well received.

Dinner happened (nachos) and the kids went their way... regular camp cleaning happened and thennn...here we be. We're watching thor on the projector and everyone is solidly into their detox and recuperate routines. Prepping for sunday when we do it all over again.

-Nick

Day 51, of lakes and boats (again)

Thursday, was a great day. We headed into town immediately after breakfast with our pontoon crew and hitched up to the boat, After doing our safety checks we strapped the boat down correctly and then continued on to the lake.

Upon our arrival I was happy to see the same kiosk person there and we had a very brief and enjoyable conversation on the way into the park. We put the pontoon into the water with very little difficulty and shortly after that noticed that one of the skids on the trailer (the things the boat sits on top of) was mostly floating. Not a huge deal but it was a bit nerve-wracking since one of the other 4 was already attached with baling twine and good intentions. By the time we pulled the trailer around to where we parked it we found that we were down to 1 skid that was attached properly and 3 that needed assistance. The moral of the story is that we need to fix our trailer (something I've been assured will be happening soon)

Despite the typical frustration of being on setup crew, lake day was a success. The kids had a great time and the staff was very involved and energetic all the way until we loaded the buses. I limped the trailer back to the church and was happy to leave it there and drive the rest of the way home with just a suburban to worry about.

The evening brought us an infusion of berry labor and the wonderful conversation that comes whenever jon, adam, and myself are in close proximity. I am not ashamed to say that I was up a bit late recharging my intellectual batteries chatting with those two men. I did manage to get into bed before friday arrived, but as you're aware the blog posts were scarce this week.

-Nick

Day 50. Of many rides and surprisingly on time schedules.

Wednesday, unlike a typical week was a day of activities. We took 3 rides out over the course of the day (one in the morning, two in the afternoon). They all went well and the biggest "excitement" came when we had a horse decide that he'd rather lay down than be ridden further, the rider hopped off and then once the horse got back up we continued on and had a great ride. Although I did have to award another trophy can of dew to him as a consolation for a horse issue.

The sunburn that I started aquiring on tuesday was in fine form by wednesday night... turns out when I'm running around so hard I forget entirely to put sunscreen on. Downside is that it was that kind of week to this point, the upside to that is this was the first week I was that exhausted and busy.

The younger crew I had this week really shone today, monday and tuesday we had a few difficulties staying on schedule because I was trying to teach and train while fixing issues and that strategy really paid off today. We were so on time that even after an hour+ in the saddle we were still back with 10 minutes to spare so we got horses watered and were ready to rock and roll by the next rides. I still wasn't on time for supper... but at least I got to eat while others were still in the dining room as opposed to the 'typical' timetable this week.

Despite or perhaps because of this I was exhausted by the time night games rolled around and I was pretty happy to get to bed in a pseudo timely manner to prep for lake day...

-Nick

Day 49. In which momentum began... and the water returned!

Tuesday! (I'm a bit behind but catching up)

Tuesday was a day that happened an eternity ago... It began as most days do, rolling out of bed, trying not to land on my face, zombie walking myself to the coffee and then trying to find the others who I should be meeting with so the day can begin. (forget apollo and his chariot, the day does not begin until adam leaves his camper)

Thus began this day, and followed breakfast, saddling, and so on and so forth. And when it came to pass that the saddling was complete the all camp activities began. And so it was that the over-under (a game where a sponge is used to transfer water from one bucket to another by passing it over your head or under your legs) was supervised and all of the childrens (except one) participated. And thusly was it good to see the sponges dribble upon the campers despite the anger of the alice burning against the one. And thusly did the princesses triumph at the over under over all the other miscreants in the land, and there was much rejoicing. It also happened that the chief princess did a happy dance. And at this time it was good for lunch to occur and it was so. The lunchen was consumed and the time to ride began. And the time to ride did complete just in time for the time to ride to begin again. And the head wrangler did say "I may have not applied enough sunscreen this aft". And there was no rejoicing. And all the childrens didst stay upon their horses for the duration of the ride, and the wranglers rejoiced and slew the wild supper to celebrate.

Well that was fun :)

the evening schedule completed as normal but this week I've not been particularly good about attending anything after our staff meeting, I'd like to dismiss that as a side effect of fatigue but it might also be contributed to by my own laziness. However because of my not attending things that I wasn't required to be at I also had the wonderful opportunity to talk with the anglican contingent here at camp. (we've got an anglican priest and an aspiring anglican priest amongst us, they're both great men and it was good to talk for a while)

umm.... I think that's it. hopefully this will get me in the neighborhood of being caught up so that my posts will be more complete and relevant (at least to my rabid fans)

-Nick
p.s. you don't know it yet but I got sunburned pretty bad on day 50... pray for that por favor.

Day 48. In which the water stopped...

I'm really not sure how long I'll have to finish this before breakfast so I'll try to be quick. I'm a day behind... but that's what it is.

Monday began as most camp sessions do, with some training and then the arrival of the kids. This lead into lunch, then a group activity, then a horseback ride (best ride of the year), then supper (I was late :[ ), then the typical evening roster (evening games, chapel, night games, snack, and campfire).

This week I've got a very young crew compared to what I typically have, the oldest (other than me) is 16. While this is strange to me now it was the sort of crew that I came up in, but It also makes for a slightly different dynamic when people aren't trained and need to be double checked a little bit. I won't go into terrible detail because I don't have a lot of time but I'd appreciate your prayers that I'm a good teacher this week, and that I'm a patient authority so that we not only get the job done but that we can be a better team by the end of the week.

Another curve ball that we had on monday was that our well pump stopped working. That means no running water. No showers, no magic refilling horse tank, no refilling your water bottle with cold water... etc. By now (wed morning) it has been fixed and we're back to normal but for about 24 hours we were hauling water or not using it. Grace was very apparent among many people here (can you tell that the theme was appropriate this week?) but it was also a trying time.

And with that I must be off. I'll try to post day 49 tonight, and then be back on schedule tomorrow morning.(I might have actually lost the notebook with the rest of the lost journals... but hopefully I'll get those up too)

As always if you're reading this, I like you. If you read this and decide to pray for us here at camp... I love you. I'm very glad I don't do this in a vacuum and God has been working in a mighty way, this is not to glorify or celebrate me... it's to point to Him and what HE has done.

May God Bless you all.
Nick

Day 47. New beginnings, and (hopefully) gracious endings.

Today I had the privilege of attending father tom's church in Casper, it was a very encouraging time and I have yet to walk away from that place without a sense of peace and without being encouraged.

I also packed up my stuff and left 'home' behind again... the apartment I've been in was fantastic and I really needed the downtime. I'm tremendously grateful for the last few days but it's time to return to Rimrock and finish the marathon we began 47 days ago.

We grouped up in the parking lot of a local church in Casper and after juggling stuff and seating assignments all of the vehicles headed out to camp. I am also happy to report that all of them arrived in a timely manner and without any incidents.

We arrived at camp, and training began for the new week... for the weekly volunteers it's a bit of an orientation, for the summer long staff it's a reminder of a few things and tells us what might be different about that particular week. We were reminded of the privilege of doing this for two more weeks, and then that window closes for another year... two weeks, a tough haul but also a blink of the eye. Pray that we finish well.

I've also got two last thoughts, first is our theme this week. Unlike many other camps ACK camps have a weekly director that writes unique curriculum for their week. This was instituted as a means to utilize more volunteers and as a way to insure that the program does not become stale or predictable to the staff by this time in the summer. This tradition is somewhat chaotic at times but it also helps staff growth. This week is no exception, The theme we have is amazing grace. We've been encouraged to practice and encourage grace and while this should be a good experience it also strikes me in the same vein as praying for patience... prayers in this would be appreciated.

annd... now i'm out of time so I'll talk about the other thing later.

-Nick

Day 46. Of down time and recouperation

Today was an incredible day. I was graciously given the opportunity to stay in casper and have some down time. So i did!

I did a whole lot of nothing, ate lunch with some dear friends, went to brave (Great movie!) and read a fair bit of my book. oh yeah... I suppose I did tag along for a few errands and got to drive ye olde clunker van (poor chadmoe) for a few minutes, but even those moments did not feel like work.

It was quite restorative. Now it's off to church in the morning, then back to camp for weekly staff training with all the weekly volunteers. I'm excited but the last two weeks are always difficult to manage gracefully... Keep me in your prayers por favor.

-Nick

Day 45. Of weeks ending and conflicting perspectives, of days off and travel time.

Today.... (or yesterday by the time I got around to writing this) today we got up and loaded up the trailer, van, and car and headed out of denver. From there we took a few detours and then made our way to our various destinations.

The detours mentioned began when we were behind where our schedules (the ones written, implied, or functionally agreed to the night before) said we should have been. At this point people began to get frustrated (as travel does to almost everyone, and traveling with others does to the rest) so by the time we arrived at the olive garden to eat lunch people and found out that they had no idea we were coming so we would have to wait for 45 minutes there was a small mutiny and instead the plan was changed and we went to a collection of faster foods for lunch.

In some ways this was frustrating (I'm a big fan of the seafood portifino at olive garden) but on the other hand I got to get qdoba for lunch and coldstone for dessert, so it turned out quite well. Primed with this level of frustration we again piled into the van and headed to Ft. Collins where we needed to pick up a few climbing ropes for the next few camps, it was nifty to see an actual REI store (I usually shop online with them) but it was a bit frustrating when everyone was kinda chomping at the bit to get home. We got the ropes without much difficulty and then carried on to Cheyenne where we needed to drop off a cooler, aquire a missing comerade, trade back a van and so on and so forth.

So we arrive in cheyenne begin the transfers of things, cooler ends up where it needs to be, comerade is in good health and welcomed, things lent to us are on their way to be returned, so a small  handful of us that are headed to casper but not by means of torington hop in the car and hit the road. We're having some difficulty finding the interstate because of a wrong turn (another frustration, albeit a no-fault one since none of us know cheyenne that well) when I got the first phone call... I had forgotten that I had the spare van key and we needed to return that along with the van... so we semi-quickly backtrack and turn in the van key, use the bathroom (a good idea before traveling) and swear a pact that we shall not stop again until casper wyoming.

We get on the road and start up an involved discussion (you all know i'm a sucker for a good discussion) and the miles begin to add up. It is here that I received calls... (consults phone) 2,3,4, and 5. Turns out the van that took the rest of the staff to torington, needs to be in casper by monday morning, and I might be the best candidate to do that. It was also suggested that I could come back on saturday and then drive back to casper again with the van, and various other ideas were tossed about. I also found it somewhat interesting that several of the calls I got described the same idea, but didn't seem to have talked to each other. Eventually the plans got more involved and strange... and I recall at one point saying (admittedly snippishly) that I wouldn't ruin saturday because I desperately needed a day off. (and do, although even just the last night and a full amount of sleep have been incredibly restorative, further updates on this one hopefully tonight)

Eventually we arrived in casper, split our tiny group of grumpy introverts (or at least semi-introverts) and two of us went to grab a bite to eat. Delicious food was had and we carried on our conversation from the drive up here.

After that I was dropped at the place I get to call 'home' for the next few days. It's a very nice little apartment complete with a real bed (I'm getting a bit spoiled) working air conditioning, comfy couch, and a actual decent inet connection! I'll be in great shape after another day of this... and then back to camp for 2 weeks.

Now, at first glance this update seems pretty negative, and to be honest it was a pretty frustrating day for many people (myself among them at times). But one of the things that has been seen this summer is that we're a gracious bunch and given time and a little space to process and recoup we're very capable of bouncing back to working smoothly and happily again.

I'm hoping that I'll write a more philosophical post later today but who knows? It's a day off... I might just be lazy instead. (also I'm probably going to brave... yay!)

-Nick

Day 44. Farewell to crossroads, Hello to the end of the week weirdness.

Today was our last day at crossroads. We slept in a bit (something we were in desperate need of) then headed over to finish our library project. We did get that done in time to eat lunch and turn around for our last day of VBS which went fairly well. After we finished up our regular VBS we stuck around to help with the kids reading club and then headed 'home'. After making a dinner of quesadillas (they were pretty great) many of us went to the gym and then returned 'home'. And here I sit... there you have it. gnite!

-Nick





psych! alrighty here's the rest of the good stuff. (in no particular chronological order or order of importance)

I sat with a man at lunch today who was a member of the program there at crossroads, he said that he had been in for a year and was hoping and praying that the church he was working with grew enough to take him on staff full time, but even if that didn't work out he had a good lead on a job and was hoping to land that soon. I promised him that I would pray for him, and I'd hope that you'd join me in that.

At the gym tonight I did enough upper body that I didn't want to cry about the tightness from a few days ago... then I biked another 12.5 miles. Good times, endorphins really help make these posts happen.

Tomorrow we head to cheyenne, casper, torington, and who knows where else... and reconvene at camp on sunday, pray for travel mercies and gracious people on the way. (we're all a bit sick of pulling up roots time and time again)

I might get shot for saying so... but the end of summer is quickly approaching and everything that comes with that. I'm not looking forward to it, but I'm feeling that wall rush toward the front of the train...

Uhhhhhh... Oyez. I know I was bit tough on the ywam types yesterday, if you're looking for the other side (and an opinion I trust and respect on the issue) please read the comments on that post as well.

-Nick

Day 43. Of frustration and fatigue, of children and chaos.

Today began as a semi-normal day (at least for this week). We awoke, and over breakfast read the third chapter of our book. This latest chapter outlined a bit of the background of the author and it reminded me in some ways of donald miller. Not quite the same level of wandering storyteller but a bit of a similar academic history.

After Breakfast we once again headed over to crossroads and continued our project of organizing, labeling, and reshelving their childrens library. We did make fairly good progress on this task but for whatever reason (fatigue, soreness, sickness, or wednesday) many of us became frustrated by the work and while we still did it we were unable to be joyful or even happy for a time. (I was told that my grumpy face came out...) In hindsight I'm a bit embarrassed that I got as grumpy as I did but... it happened.

We worked through lunch (we were fasting that meal anyway) and with just a few minutes to spare before the kids arrived (they live at crossroads so the arrival is swift) we piled the books in such a way that we'll be able to finish the job tomorrow morning. We're at the point where if we left things as they are now it'll be worse than when we started, but a few more hours and we'll be in much better shape overall.

Afternoon rolled around and we once again set up the marketplace. I don't think I've explained what that is so I'll do that now. The marketplace is a vbs program that sets up a set of stations that mimic activities that could have been around in biblical times. For instance we've got a scribe/artist (they can draw or write with little feather quills) a potter/sculpter (clay is fun stuff) a musician (kids love to hit drums) a storyteller (stories!)
and a food stall (awesome every day except when you're fasting). The composition of activities has changed day to day (we made little sandals the first day, but that's been scrapped) and I'm sure there are some I forgot but the general gist is that the kids earn some money during group time for memorizing a verse and whatnot. They also can go to a few money earning stations in the market itself (we had a soldier who was testing new recruits and would hand out money to types that could do push ups and jumping jacks and stuff, and a rich man who gave out money to people who would participate in the least busy activity, or they could recite the verse in lieu of paying 'cash').

At some point in the day Jesus (a role played by adam) would enter the market and make a big scene recreating a biblical story. (zacceus, the woman at the well, or the healing of a blind man) usually right before this the market would begin to close and right after the kids would go discuss what they saw and learned during the afternoon. After this time they'd get free time until 4:30 and we'd move on to our next stop.

Today that stop was a place called Davids tent which is the homeless ministry of Church in the City - Beth Abraham. It is a ministry of Jews for Jesus and was somewhat interesting of a night to be there since we were not the only missions group there. We were joined by a huge contingent of YWAM types who were there to observe? perhaps? I say this because the only ones that were involved in serving were the YWAM leaders. We hopped in and because they were short on servers (or at least appeared to be) we ended up helping distribute the meal. It became quickly apparent that most of the YWAM kids (I say most because there were about 150 of them there and only about 20 were helping serve) were more interested in trying to convert the homeless however possible than they were in feeding the physical bodies of people who were there because they were hungry and needed a meal. We saw several different expressions of this but the most notable were that they tried to convert a professing catholic (a chronic homeless man, but still) with the promise that faith in christ would make his life easier (he told them that he did believe in Jesus but didn't believe that would make his life easier) and that they said they would pray over another man who'd had a stroke 'until he was healed', we left before they did but they were throwing the name of Jesus around like He's some sort of magical talisman and it didn't appear to have any effect, also I found it a bit frustrating that in their large clump of wailing people the fringes would take breaks to film the whole process with their cell phones. I had to remind myself on the way out the door that I do like YWAM and that they are just kids for the most part... but this was not their strongest showing overall, and it was egged on by their leadership. In all fairness the rest of their leadership was serving right alongside us and there were several of their kids who were talking and approaching people to learn their stories and encourage them instead of looking down on people. I do realize that I'm probably being unfair and don't know what their debrief looked like... but I was a bit dissatisfied with what I saw.

After that we headed 'home' and most folks went on to the gym. I did not this go around as I instead elected to go to bed early... so early in fact that I'm writing this the next morning. (with krispy kreme in hand)

-Nick
p.s. lots of our staff are sick so please keep praying that we have the energy and health to finish strong.
p.p.s. krispy kremes are delicious.

Day 42. Of repetition and innovation, of endorphins and ibuprofin

Today was a pretty cool day. I spent a bit too long in a conversation with friends so I'll try to be brief so I can go to bed.

The day began with chapter 2 of the book. (see yesterday) and then we went on to Crossroads for a work project and our VBS afternoon. The morning project was organizing a little library for the kids department, because of previous disorganization and physical limitations, it was interesting to see someone elses point of stress and be able to help out in such a way that it didn't turn into a wreck of a project. I offhandedly referred to it as "their feed bunk" in reference to the project waaay back during orientation that pushed me out near the stress saturation point, but I don't know that this one was quite that bad, hopefully not anyway and the people on the project worked hard and we got a fair bit done. We'll go back to finish it tomorrow.

After eating lunch in the cafeteria we moved on to working with the kids themselves and conducted another afternoon of our VBS program. Today I got to be the food shop person and had a blast selling little candies and goldfish to the kids for fake monies. (I don't know if I've explained what our program is buuut i'll do that tomorrow).

After VBS we moved on to the same VOA mission we were at yesterday and helped serve their 4th meal again. (they do 2 suppers) It was pretty gratifying to see the workers there again and help them out and we also got to see a bunch of their regular volunteers working and got to work alongside a few of them. (several of their guests volunteer there)

After supper we came 'home' and then moved on to the gym again. Somehow I got talked into doing an upper body workout for a while and even tonight I was a bit sore, hopefully the proactive consumption of ibuprofin that I did just a few moments ago will help the morning be not quite so terrible. But it is further proof that I should be exercising more regularly once the camp season is over...

And then last and certainly not least on the way back from the gym I started (or was involved in, whichever perspective you prefer) a fairly in depth conversation with a few other staff members which carried on for quite some time. This resulted in a fairly happy Nick, but also a Nick who was late to post and is starting to resemble a zombie (and one who is starting to write in the 3rd person).

prayer requests/bullet point updates.
-lots of us are sick, in fact 2 staff members are out of commission because of it (one took the day off to sleep and the other is home this week to recover). The rest of us are fighting various symptoms and would really prefer not to be sick

-We're back at camp this coming sunday, pray that we can switch gears back and be effective for the last 2 weeks.

-Rimrock (the other half of our organization) is running a few weeks of camp while we're on the road, pray that they are used in a powerful Way to help kids grow and learn.

-I've been talking with several of our staff (and been thinking to myself) a fair bit about the future... we're all committed to going where God leads each of us, but many of us don't know what that looks like, pray for vision and clarity as well as peace on whatever road we're sent to.

Das all I got. off to bed I go.

-Nick

Day 41. Of rescue missions and social anxiety, of gifts and gals and various other sundries.

Today has been an interesting day. We began the day by beginning a book in group study called "the 24-hour Christian". We only read chapter one but so far I think it's pretty good, time will tell and if any particular ones stick out I'll write about that at a later date.

After breakfast and book group we moved on and headed over to a facility run by the Denver Rescue Mission. We spent a bit in training and learning how off some of our perceptions are about poverty and homelessness. It was a both informative and intriguing. After eating lunch in the cafeteria there we began our first day of VBS with the kids in the facility. This morning we only had about 10 of them (tops) but it was still fun to see them enjoy the activities and to give their parents a short break.

I got the job of kid wrangler which is a bit outside of my ideal wheelhouse but it was still a bit of a blast to hang out with the lil guys again. Although to be fair I'm exhausted... but that's normal for 8pm on a monday. And I really can't complain because I got paired up with my co-counselor from last week again and she's basically amazing so it works out.

After the DRM we moved on to a Volunteers of America where we helped serve a meal to about 100 people. It wasn't particularly new of an experience but it was very cool to talk to a few of the guests and also to see how that facility focused on volunteer labor to get everything done. The few staffers that we met were obviously involved in the business that comes with front-line service work but they were gracious and it was incredibly enjoyable to help them in the small way that we could.

I am a bit amazed how much I forget about my social awkwardness when I'm doing things like camp but when i'm placed in any place where I can't meet people at my pace or without any 'safe' zone, it's a failing but it was also nice to be reminded that i'm not really an extrovert... i just fake being one professionally.

at this point in time we're back at our 'home' church and a few folks are prepping to head over to the gym for a few hours. Most of us aren't motivated to work out too much during camp... but that's also where we have to go to get a shower so... yep :)

short post today... meh

-Nick

addendum: after initially writing this we went to the gym and I put in 45 minutes on the bike... it was delightful and the little machine said I went something like 12 miles... good times :)

Day 34. Lost Journal #2

Today was most excellent, we spent a while in prayer for the upcoming week first thing in the morning and then began the necessary prep for campers to arrive.

Also I should mention that the staff did the climbing wall and zipline here at TWM at some point. My memory is fuzzy on whether it was Sunday night or Monday morning. Either way it was fun and when I reached the top I was amazed how little the height was affecting me, and then I made the mistake of looking straight down... at least by that point I was already done and it was ok that my brain shutdown in a panic for a short moment.

Anyway campers arrived and were assigned teams {the composition of which was 1-2 guys and 4-5 girls, one male counselor and one female counselor} and at the time of this writing we've completed several challenges without winning any. But thus far we're doing well, the team is bonding and we havn't really embarrassed ourselves in any of them.

And now for a strange collection of short paragraphs.

One of my campers was a bit hesitant to be placed with me instead of the same leader he had last year but Keith {the leader he had last year} put in a good word for me and since then I haven't had any issues.

It is already exciting to see the changes between high school kids and the little guys. We had a short moment of reevaluating coming off of primary camp but it's very cool to be with an older age group.

I'm really excited about my partner in crime this week. Thus far we're working quite well together and it should be a great week for us and hopefully for our kids as well.

{as mentioned yesterday these were written on the day in question and are simply posted late... for the sake of historical accuracy I'll copy everything as accurately as possible}

Prayer Requests:

-That I can find time to get everything I need to done this week

-That I and the rest of the staff will have enough and the right kind of energy to keep up with our charges this week.

-Nick

Day 33. Lost Journal #1

By the time this one reaches the internet it will be at least a few days out of date {7 to be exact} As I suspected initially Table in the Wilderness is isolated enough that cell phones and inet service are not accessable to me. On top of that the guys 'cabins' this week are just large tents so I also don't have power to write this on my laptop. {it was handwritten and then transcribed to computer right now} So if these happen to take a while to get the whole week posted it's likely due to the fact I can't read my own handwriting from time to time. {so far I've done ok though}

Over the last 24 hours not much has happened in the itinerary arena, we attended church in saratoga and enjoyed some incredible fellowship until about 1pm after which we rolled out and headed up over the mountains to Table in the wilderness, the place henceforth referred to as home for the next week. {it has since changed again... twice... but that's getting ahead of the story}

The church service in saratoga was at a tiny cowboy church and the presence of our staff easily doubled the size of the congregation. It was an incredibly encouraging experience to be among a group of older beleivers that are still as passionate{if not more so} about the things of God as us young foolish types and it was great to see how excited they were to hear about camp and how God has been working. It was also a pleasure to hear our very own Adam Tibbs preach on ministry, steadfastness, and God's faithfulness. {If you're reading this and have the opportunity to hear him preach I highly recommend it}.

Another notable memory from this morning was how Pastor Les began his opening prayer. He clasped his hands together and began with a simple heartfelt “Abba Father, Dearest daddy... “ it struck me as odd for only a few seconds and perhaps coming from nearly anyone else it might have continued to be strange but as Les continued in an incredibly heartfelt petition it instead came across as a wonderful sincerity. Pastor Les is a great man and the love of God flows out of him in a way that I've only experienced a few times. Truly it was good to be in the house of the Lord.

From church we drove almost uninterrupted to table in the wilderness {not counting the semi-regular stops to let our van cool off} but we did stop near the top of the mountain and did a little scrambling over the rocks, it was good times and I got a few nifty pictures that I might post on here... but I might not. Time will tell.

I've also got another story that I'd like to record for today but I'm out of time at the moment so I'll just end here {not really, keep reading. I kept this in here for the sake of historical accuracy}

-Nick

addendum: {written later that day} Guess what? I found a few moments to write this section as promised. I also wanted to comment on the fact that as we were loading the van on Sunday morning how incredible the group of women we have on our team are this year. This is not to say that past years are in any way inferior but it is rare to find such gorgeous ladies (without exception) all in one place. I use the word gorgeous intentionally because beauty is often confused with merely skin-deep appearance. But I must say that these women... are gorgeous. And it's a priviledge and an honor to serve alongside each and every one of them.

p.p.s. {anything I wrote between these little dealies was added after the fact and will hopefully serve as a good link between the past and present}

Day 40. Of lost journals and new homes, of memories and grace.

I have returned to the internet! Or rather the internet has returned to me... I'm not sure which and at this point I'm not complaining either way. I'll be publishing the missing posts as “lost journals” since they are written but need to be transcribed into typed documents before I can put them online. I'll try to do at least one of them on top of my regularly scheduled updates so for a while I'll be updating lots n lots.

Today began with church (as many sundays do) or rather today began with waking up at the church in cheyenne, packing up, eating breakfast, packing the trailer again, going to church, packing the trailer a third time, being blessed by a brother in christ (i'll explain this one later in this entry) and then repacking the trailer one last time. In short me no likee packing the trailer that many times but at very least the last time it was done right. In this I am my fathers son...

The service mentioned above was the early service at the church in Cheyenne, and it is the traditional service. It was somewhat encouraging to see such a traditional service where hymns are still sung... every verse, sitting down (standing is for those pesky youngsters) where communion is served every service and at the same time it was a bit boring. Also I didn't necessarily agree with the sermon... but in all fairness it was kinda interesting and reminded me of the 'frozen chosen” style services I grew up attending so if for no other reason than that it was good to be there.

After the service we repacked the trailer (yeah it was actually that many times) to fit the cots and various other things loaned to us by the church there and hitched up the shiney newer van that they're letting us use. (a van with working AC... PRAISE GOD) and to remove the gear that one of our number owns. He headed home for a few days (hopefully not more than that) to recover from a persistant sickness that he's had. Last but not least we were lent an air mattress pump which saved me the trouble of blowing mine up manually again. Huzzah all round for generous encouraging persons.

Upon our arrival in Denver we grabbed lunch on the 16^th street mall. I got my first taste of smashburger which was quite delightful and we had a pretty good time people watching for about an hour.

After the mall we moved on to our new home, the basement of a small church. At this point we're getting good at loading and unloading... but I am starting to miss my own bed. Or at very least a place where my things can live semi-permanently

During the upcoming week we're in Denver. We'll be working alongside and partnering with several ministries and I'll letcha know what the daily happenings are.

-Nick

Day 32 Of hot springs and other things.

Day 32 Of hot springs and other things.

Today was incredibly restorative. The day officially began with breakfast at 10 am. I decided it was best if I slept in rather than going out hiking at 6 or 7am with two of our comerades and instead my body let me sleep in to the wonderful hour of 7:45. From here I finished my book, got into the word a bit (finally finished working through James) and generally relaxed and enjoyed the quiet.

Precisely on time our ride rolled up and we went to breakfast with about half? Maybe a little over half of the staff. The rest were still snoozing and as breakfast was optional today we let them be. Breakfast was incredibly good and the pancakes and eggs really hit the spot. After breakfast we had some fun conversations ranging from computer games, computers, where we think technology is going, why I should get an Ipad, and so on (a lot of us are nerds). Our conversations lasted so long that before we had even left the table lunch was served, a wonderful spaghetti pie casserole thing (think spaghetti except the noodles are replaced with spaghetti squash). It was once again delicious. After consuming so much food I staggered back to 'home' and took a nap for a few hours. Our timetable was waiting on the littlest member of staff (he's 2) to take his nap so I figured I'd join in on naptime.

Several hours later I was awakened and most of the staff loaded up and headed into saratoga to experience the saratoga hot springs. It was wonderful. The water was heated enough that it relaxed muscles I wasn't aware were still knotted and it was cool enough that we seldom had to seek refuge out of the water. I even got talked into sticking my feet into the hottest part of the pool for a slow “5 one-thousand” count. It was good times.

Upon our return we had about an hour of downtime until yet another amazing meal (beef strogonof) once again prepared by one of our directors. Someone commented that this was why the college students kept coming back to their house every week because the food was this good. Not being around here in the off-season I don't know about that, but I do know that the food was very good. Karissa did an excellent job providing for us today. (this is not unusual, but it was especially noticeable on a day when we had time to sit and eat for a while)

The evening rolled around and after struggling with computers for a short time we finally managed to create an improvised network and played a few rounds of age of empires. I only made it through one game before I went off to bed but I heard at least one more played out as I was drifting off to sleep. I can't explain how encouraging it is to be part of a group of people that are comrades not only in the work of camp but in the oddity and weirdness that comes with being a geek as well.

Today we are joining a small congregation here just outside of Saratoga and then I think we head over the mountain to table in the wilderness which will be home base for high school camp. I'll be a counselor for that week and I'm really looking forward to it! I'm sure stories will abound but once again depending on the work required or the state of the internet/cell signal where we'll be at I don't know if I'll be able to update much. I will as I am able, this has been a useful process for me and thus far has fulfilled all the goals I originally set it to do.

What are those goals you might ask. They are simply as follows:

1. To keep my home church and friends not able to be at camp appraised of what I'm doing
2. To mark the passage of time and make sure that later I'll be able to remember what God has done in my life.
3. To help myself process what has happened in a day, much of this portion gets cut out in editing but you do get to see the shape of that in these posts

It has been fun and I'm looking forward to at least another month of this process.

-Nick

Day 31 of laundry, driving, and delays.

Today was a strange day, we started the morning with once again pulling up our roots and leaving the place we have called home for the last week. We loaded up our tiny trailer and hitched up chad-moe. (our semi-faithful van) From here we went to the laundromat and got a little caught up on laundry, during this time we also tried to be somewhat preventative about mechanical issues and were as proactive as we could be about adding the fluids necessary to poor ol' chad-moe. A few of the staff also did a brief shopping trip while things were in the dryers.

Once all of the above were completed we once again loaded up and rolled out to a house someplace in casper (I still don't have a good mental picture of where we were any more than that) where two supporters of camp had prepared lunch for the whole staff. It was a delicious lunch and it was very good to see both of them again.

After lunch, we started the trek out of town and higher up the mountains to saratoga wyoming. It was somewhat eventful as our poor van has issues with oveorheating when he's asked to pull us and a trailer full of things up large hills without a little bit of downhill to cool off. Turns out that's a fair bit of the route through here. So every hour and a bit (or so it seemed) we took a few minutes to let the van cool off and happily accepted the opportunity to stretch our legs. Eventually we reached our destination and set up camp in our new home. (an empty trailer home, now packed to the gills with us and our stuff).

As we were driving out here I was reminded of a road trip I took several years ago, from spearfish SD to Pasadena CA. Being crazy and not really minding where I ended up I just plugged pasadena into google maps, printed a thing off and started driving. Well part of that route is the same highways that we drove today. The even cooler part is that back when I was driving this route before, God had really been reminding me that He is faithful, He is powerful, and even though I often feel like i'm not worth much... He cares about me and is willing and able to take care of me.

One of the ways in which I was reminded of the power of God was a section of road where you can see the mountains rising around you on either side of the road but you're in a valley, the last time I was here The mountains were getting rained on and a thunderstorm was raging on top. But as I was driving I was in sunlight and dry. It was slightly less visually impressive (still fairly impressive though) but no less spiritually meaningful when this time the valley was shrouded in shadow but the peaks of the mountains were still in the sunlight. Even without the quick visual it would have been pretty cool to re-walk an old pilgrimage in my mind; combined with the new visual it was incredibly encouraging.

Prayer requests:

-That my cold (or whatever it is) continues to subside and that I'm back to 100% by monday

-That the few missing staff members would have safe travels and be re-united with us soon

-That we all can rest fully and in every way this weekend. That we'd be renewed and ready to minister to campers this coming week.

-That as we hit the halfway mark this weekend and patience begins to wear thin, that we'd be gracious and flexible to smooth what we have to do. (and that it would begin with me)

This week is high school camp, we've got a few days of non-typical schedule until then... but then we go to table in the wilderness, and after that week it's on to denver for a week. And after that we head back to rimrock for the tail end of the summer.

Nick

p.s. Internet availability might be a bit scarce this week but rest assured that I will continue to write posts even if they aren't uploaded in a timely manner.

Day 30. The end of lil kid camp,

As mentioned above, today was the end of primary camp. After 4 fairly busy days of having a horde of little kiddos, we were all a bit glad to see them go home and not have to worry about being up at 6:30 to do it all over again. On the flip side we were also fairly sad to see the little guys go home... even after a few days you do get a bit of an attachment and they are just so darn cute sometimes.

Today we did our regular routines of a minimal chapel service, some large group games, and whatnot we ate lunch (hot dogs!) and headed up to casper mountain for a short hike up to the waterfall. After the hike we headed further up the mountain and spent the remainder of the day frolicking at a picnic area and tie-dyed pillowcases with each of the campers. (brilliant idea as kids will outgrow a t-shirt waaay too fast).

The end of a camp is always exhausting and today was no exception, after about 5:30 we all seemed to hit a wall and started dragging fairly hard. Despite this it was a great day and because of the early end we got to spend a few hours chatting, telling stories, and generally getting to know the other staff members a bit better.

I know this is a bit of a token post... but such is life eh?

-Nick

Day 29. Lake day!

Today was little kid lake day. We went to a nearby state park (at least I think that's what it was) and enjoyed a day filled with swimming, splashing, and tiny fish catching. It was really fun to see the similarities to a 'normal' lake day while at the same time being blown away by how different it really can be when you're a wee child and the lake is still the coolest thing ever.

I can tell you one thing, the post-lake day fatigue feels very similar to the other weeks of camp. I had less of worrying about getting boats into the water and making sure they're running, and more of "I'm a large tugboat, why don't you grab on and get pulled along for a while". This game was fun, but was even more fun was when a group of campers (and one staff member) decided that they were going to chant "fish are friends, not food", to which we replied "fish are food, and they taste great!" The war raged on and ended in an impasse. (although the staffer told me afterwards that yeahhhh... fish are basically delicious)

Also as I'm sure you are aware, today is wednesday and the calendar week is over half done. Normally this also means we're just hitting our stride for the week of camp but with this group we've got one more day. We did 3 full days and after they head home tomorrow we're done, As is also typical this means we're exhausted and spiritual warfare and fallen human nature are flaring up left and right. We've had several situations that have been dealt with but that are directly related to the fact that a fallen world by its very nature will rebel against the presence of kingdom things happening. Factor in human fatigue and random entropy and the middle of the week can get a bit rough... So we'd appreciate your prayers for energy, grace, and a renewed awareness of the real situation and the priorities we MUST have in light of that.

Nick
p.s. apparently if I do this for a few more days it might have become a habit.
p.p.s. I'm starting to get a cold so I'd appreciate your prayers on that front too

Day 28. Of waterfights and shoulder rides.

Primary camp rolls ever onward. Most of the ravening horde returned again for another day filled with crazy energy and wonderment. Kids are incredible entertaining because they have yet to develop a filter, so when they're mad they will occasionally lecture their counselors (especially if that counselor 'won' the waterfight but dumping a bucket of water on said camper) complete with one fist on their hip and one finger wagging in the air. Or they're not able to hide the crushed feelings of being told "one minute and I'll give you another shoulder ride, I'm a bit sore at the moment". On the flip side, kids are a blast when you get a pack of em together and with water balloons in hand hunt down a group leader that is suspiciously dry. Or the joy that lights up their face when they're told "ok, I'm ready now... hop on!". I love kids, and despite the fact that they wear me out they're a blast to be around.

Hmm... lessee I'll hit the timeline afore I go off on the rant I've already chosen for today annd... because it's new I'll do a tick-tock sorta format and see how it goes. all times are approximate and all facts are colored by my perception, they could be fairly innaccurate at times...but hopefully it'll be fun and exciting anyway.

6:15- alarm went off.
6:15.00001- snooze button was hit.
6:30-breakfast began
6:32-finally turned alarm off and rolled out of bed.
6:55-ate breakfast
7:00-breakfast stopped being served
7:15-scheduled bus departure time
7:25ish-actual departure time
8:00-arrive at the link. told I'm helping with food today, made mental shift to 'cook' instead of gopher.
8:10-began prep for lunch
8:25-finished lunch prep
8:30-first campers arrive
9:00-scheduled camper arrival time
9:30-depart the link with campers and begin walk to the parade route (casper had a parade today)
10:00-began singing campfire songs to keep kids occupied while waiting for parade to start.
10:15-parade begins.
11:00-lunch types walk back to the link to make sure we're ready to go at 11:30
11:15-arrive at link. discover door is locked and we were not given a key...
11:25-arrive back at parade route and get key for the link
11:35-arrive back at the link and begin lunch prep. (to be ready to go at 11:30)
11:45-campers arrive and lunch is served
12:30-depart the link for the park
1:00-arrive at park
1:02-depart park with adam to go fill water balloons.
1:04-arrive at location to fill water balloons
1:04.002-get phone call summoning adam back to the park
1:07-return adam to park, fetch morgan
1:09-return to water balloons, begin assembly line.
1:21-adam walks up and joins assembly line
1:45-balloons loaded and we return to the park.
1:46-overcome by temptation, water balloons tested on select members of staff.
2:30-group stations (playground, parachute, sponge relay, etc)
3:00-strategic water balloon ammo dumps placed around park.
3:01-unprovoked staff attack on campers
3:01.000000000001-campers find ammo stashes and delightful chaos results.
3:15-all water balloons expended, all water dumped on people, and remaining drinking water was declared de-weaponized.
3:20-reward was offered to camper with the most trash picked up
3:21-park was cleaner than when we arrived.
3:30-bus arrived and campers were loaded
4:00-arrive back at the link
4:15-campfire songs in the gym
4:45-free time and games, parents begin to arrive.
5:30-last camper departs, final cleanup begins, unbaked pizza arrives at the link
5:31-cleanup is finished and staff is ready to depart and eat pizza
6:00-return to home base at highland park church unbaked pizza in hand.
5:59-pizza put in oven
6:30-pizza consumed quickly, efficiently and somewhat brutally
7:30-meetings and such
8:30-more meetings
9:00 released for quiet time, this post began
9:36 current time.

So there you have it. A non-comprehensive idea of the day.

and now onto the serious ish things. One of the other advantages that we have as a team this week is that we've been blessed by a group of younger men and women to be counselors in training. These 7 folks are given a great deal of responsibility and are paired up with an older mentor (yeah I know I might have mentioned that part before but this is my blog so shush you). They've been doing a good job at times, and a poor job at times but if I had to graph it I'd say it's an upward sloping graph for sure.

Now, the thing that I've been thinking about and that has been on my mind lately is this... I've said many times that God gives us the team that we need every summer. There is never any 'dead weight' present and there is always something to learn from each and every person that we get to work alongside. This has also been proven true this summer and this week. That having been said it also amazes me how ungracious and downright cranky I can be with people sometimes. I have a hard time keeping my mouth shut when I'm at camp (a problem that is often reversed elsewhere) and allowing God to grow people at His pace and not my own and I'll try to quickly and artificially force solutions where a slow strength is being developed by God instead. I need to remind myself of where I was at that age and when I compare that to where I see these young men and women... I'm impressed by them. They're in good shape and I'm glad that they're here.

annnd... now i'm being summoned to eat cake... so gubye!

-Nick

Day 27. In which there be a great horde of wee tykes! And several driving tours of casper.

Today began far too early... although in some days it began when my fellow staffers snoring awakened me. However if you don't count that the day still began frightfully early. I rolled/fell out of bed at approximately 6:29. You might wonder why I awoke at such a weird time and I'd love to set that sort of issue to rest. I awoke at that time because breakfast was being served at 6:30. After breakfast we rolled on out to the site where camp is based out of (it's an old boys and girls club, the facility is pretty cool). And that's about the end of what I saw of a camp morning.

As we were driving over to the link (that's the name of the site), we got a call from our weekly director who had gotten a flat tire on the way to the same place. So my to-do list involved getting the spare tire on her car (easier said than done when the car in question has funky custom lug-nuts) fetching prescriptions for the sick staffer mentioned in yesterdays post, grabbing the few missing groceries for lunch and so on and so forth. It was a good morning but I didn't even meet the kids until after lunch. Luckily most of them still had their name tags on and I was easily able to identify em.

The afternoon consisted of a trip out to a farm where the kids got to see horses, pet cows, a peacock, a few cats and dogs and whatnot. They were pretty excited about that part and the staff was pretty excited that we played a fun game of red rover without anyone getting hurt.

After a few exhausting and wonderfully chaotic hours we adjourned back to the link and had our version of campfire. (more of a song circle really) After that we cleaned up and the parents started arriving to take the little types home.

All in all it was a pretty fun day... I got a few opportunities to hang out with some incredible kids, to make a few friends with the kids who seemed inclined to stay near the fringe of a group (an inclination I remember quite well back when I was young) and I am wonderfully exhausted.

hmm... I suppose this is where I put my rant for the day. Lessee ... oh yeah! when I started writing this it was using the rest of a section of time set aside for a quiet time, I did get into the word for a brief moment but I've never really been able to do the whole "10 minutes every day" thing. I get into the word most days and spend some time in prayer but that might be 2 minutes, and it has been as long as a few hours before, but whenever I try to dictate how long I will work on anything of that nature it is a struggle to get anything beneficial out of it. I heard a good sermon about it once that basically said that we shouldn't focus on the quantity of that sort of thing, but instead focus on having quality time with God. Mandating that we spend precise intervals can easily result in legalism but allowing God to work often causes a great deal of freedom and joy for the Lord to work.

And that's all I've got to say for now...

-Nick

Day 26. Of mega churches and training days, of friends and frisbee

Today was a good day, we woke up and broke camp before church and then attended the same church which we'll call home for the next few week or so. It is always an interesting experience attending this church because it is very different than what I'm used to and I don't particularly resonate with the format that they use for their worship. Don't get me wrong they are very passionate about their ministry, but I've really fallen in love with my tiny church and I don't really like the feeling that if I wasn't there no one would notice.

That having been said I also was blown away by the sermon this morning. I appreciated it immensely the openness with which it was delivered and the pastor was incredibly vulnerable with the struggles that he has come through personally and professionally.

After church we went to the mall for food court fun times, and to get a wee dose o' starbucks before training began. I had taco johns... it made me miss tuesdays at home.

We came back 'home' and set up camp (although to be fair I have been blowing up my air mattress in between paragraphs) and did our typical meetings and learning the ins and outs of this week of camp. It was quite enjoyable (or as much as those things can be).

The solid highlight of the day was the semi-impromptu games of frisbee that we played all the way until our frisbee was broken in a moment of frustration (not by me but it easily could have been). It was good times and even though I'm still wiped out it is a great tired and I'm quite happy that we were able to have that time to frolic.


Since I havn't asked for specific prayer requests in a while here are a few.

-One of our guys was recently diagnosed with strep. Pray for his health and that it ends with him, instead of him just being patient zero.
-Pray for our team of directors this week, they're doing a great job but it's a special sort of stressful to run a camp like this for a week.
-Pray for me, It has been a great season so far but especially at the midpoint like this I need to remind myself to keep my head in the game, pray that I can do that without distractions or efforts that might be counter-productive to the call we've been given.
-Pray for a spirit of peace and restfulness. We're getting as much sleep as we can, and working as smartly as we can... but we're running on borrowed steam at this point. Pray that we can keep our engines roaring to keep up with the wee kiddos this week.

Day 25. Of horse corrals and swimming pools.

Day 25 began in the same way most do... however this time we were awake and there to witness it. This was a fun exercise and also a bit of a reminder that most ranchers work a great deal harder than I do (at least on average). We woke up and grabbed some breakfast, and by 5am ish half of us were headed up the mountain to start working.

We arrived up top about 30-45 minutes later and got rolling on a row of fenceposts. These were not ordinary fenceposts though, when Ben builds a corral he does it right, so the posts we were sinking were old railroad ties. Incredibly heavy buggers that are also soaked in a fair bit of creosote tar so they don't rot. Over the course of the day we managed to get 3 sides of a big pen done, and what stopped us was the auger on the skid-steer broke. It was near the time we were out of energy anyway but 5 of us finished the last side by hand while most of the crew headed back down the hill.

Eventually the truck made its way back up to pick us up and get some of the tools, and by this time we'd long since discovered that the soda cooler had been left behind and reduced it to merely an ice cooler. We also were all tired enough that somewhat insane hilarity ensued. The restorative power of laughter is great stuff.

hmm... after returning to the base of the mountain we discovered camp had been packed up and we were ready to roll across town to our next temporary home.

We made our magical journey and arrived, set up camp, and fairly promptly began to swim. yaay swimming! It was quite refreshing but did quickly devolve into a tiny rendition of lake day where your sucess hinged on how often you got dunked.

We ate dunner and then sleep happened. I felt somewhat inclined to write these posts last night but was tired enough that it may have been dangerous (albeit possibly entertaining).

Today we attend church at the same facility we'll be living all week and we get the rest of the team for primary camp!

hmm... rant.... Despite the busy days we had and despite the incredible fatigue that comes from a full day of work I think I've rested and recovered in the last few days more than I have poured out. The laughter and conversations I've had with old friends and new, the wonderful support that comes from a team that just gets the job done and has fun doing it... and the blessings that God has bestowed upon us greatly outpace the aches and pains, the sleep that I wish I had more of and the pain of the scrapes on my arm. (don't worry mum and martha they're taking good care of me). I am so excited that we're only halfway done. There is so much to look forward to!

-Nick
p.s. I think zach wants to take down my tent so I'll finish here.

Day 24. The one on which I didn't have internet or energy.

Day 24. (the one where I didn't keep good notes, so i'll just try to remember as best I can)

Today was a day of travel, after the arrival of all of the remaining summer staff last night we slept at a handful of houses in torington and when morning rolled around we ate breakfast, and packed the trailer. While most were left to help pack or make sure their stuff got packed, I was dispatched to camp to feed horses for the last time for a few weeks. It is not a very well kept secret that although I do enjoy horses a great deal I don't always appreciate the fact that it is near impossible to toss hay to horses without getting little pieces of it ALL over you. Feeding went well and myself, jenni (the highest ranking member of our expedition) and hunter quickly completed our to-do lists and headed back to town.

Once we got back in town it was a simple process to throw our stuff into the trailer and then everyone piled into the van and we hit the road. Our van's name right now is chadmoe. At some point in the past he had been named moe and that's a good name for him... however when he's a bad van and tries very hard to overheat we prefer to call him chad because that's an easier name to be angry with. (there was some debate as to why but it was generally agreed upon without any great discussion otherwise) While rolling down the road a few of us had a discussion about books that we like and our favorite authors, when we were doneish the remainder of the van had fallen asleep. I think we might have been boring them or some such... meh.

Anyway, last few highlights and then I'll move on to some sort of rant.

-We had low air in a tire, normally this means stopping at a service station and filling it up. Instead it required stopping at a service station, zach fixing the service station air compressor, and thennn filling up the tire.

-We had lunch at a little picnic shelter called "the castle" it's an old CCC project and if I should ever come into a LARGE sum of money I think I want one attached to the back of my house.

-near the end of our drive we had a little exercise where you say something nice about whomever's turn it is. I was surprised at how much people had to say about each other and think the general response was "yep, it was all true. but they lied when they were talking about me". nevertheless it was an entertaining time and we'll have to return the favor to our directors (who conveniently excused themselves with the excuse of "we're heeeere")

We arrived in casper and set up site at the eagle ridge ranch where we would spend a large portion of the next day (and arguably the night in between) working on putting in a ton of fenceposts for a corral. It was nice to see the entire scott family again (I was a ranch-hand there for 3 weeks last summer) and I was reminded of many good memories I had packed into such a short time last year.

At this point we went to sleep. Or rather I did... or tried to. 4am was coming far too swiftly for my taste.

-Nick
p.s. I'll do my 'rant' in the day 25 post probably.

Day 23. The one in which i'm full of shtuf. (arguably all of them)

Today was a good day. It was not a particularly difficult day, nor was it a particularly easy day... but it was a good day if for no other reason than I was able to get done what I needed to, and I grew just a little bit. I'll cover the timeline in broad strokes before I expound further.

Today began with a fairly low-key morning, unloaded my stuff from the suburban and generally just killed some time while waiting for the time when we'd have to go out to camp and where our to-do list could come to full fruition. Once we got all of that figured out and lined up (I mostly just sat around wishing I could help) we grabbed some lumber and headed out to camp. Upon our arrival we ate lunch and then finished up the snazzy new staircase off of the backside of the camp building. Not only is it very nice and useful as an aid for traffic in and out of the building but it also is a permanent fix to a fire code issue. (as I understand it we weren't in violation but we are in better shape now) During the morning I got a chance to spend some time with danny, one pair of our directors (we're led by two married pairs) son. It was a blast just to see his childish glee and how very few things are insignificant to a child. I'll likely write a full post on this at some point during primary camp but I'll merely say that It reminded me of my friends kids back home and that was both fun and made me miss them as well.

After completing our carpentry we fed horses and headed home. (home right now being torington) We enjoyed a tasty supper that was a group effort and enjoyed the steady stream of the rest of the camp team reuniting with us. It was great to see the crew back together and It just reminded me that the end of camp isn't far away... Seasons are powerful but they do come to an end far too swiftly. But enough on that point! On to the real reason I decided to write this tonight instead of waiting until the morning. 

At one point in the evening I was chatting with one of the gals on staff and she challenged me with a question that I did not have an immediate response to. I paused for a moment and then launched into a half-formed idea that really had no basis in reality nor adequately captured the point I was trying to make. She quietly looked away and commented that I was full of excrement. (that's not the word she used but... I'll just substitute that for now.) It startled me for a moment and stopped me in my tracks. Even now a few hours later It's still rattling around in my brain that she was (and is) completely right.

For as long as I can remember I've always loved to be the guy who knew stuff. Really about anything. I love being able to jump into nearly every conversation and have something relevant and interesting to add. In many ways this is a profound weakness of mine to this day and even more so in the past it caused me to just add my own made up or partially unknown thoughts to a conversation figuring that if I didn't know odds are the other people wouldn't either and I might be able to bluff my way into looking smart. To this day I'm still very bad about opening my mouth and just talking my way out of things that I really should just chew on for a while and I also find it very difficult to admit that I can't explain something. Sometimes I'll think or feel something and I'll cheapen it with half baked and inadequate chatter and miss the whole point. Because of that I'm always thankful when people call me on these sorts of moments (maybe not at the time but I come around eventually) and I'd like to hope that these sorts of reminders are fewer and further between than they used to be. I'm still growing and hopefully will wake up tomorrow a bit better than the garbled incoherent mess I was today. More importantly I pray that tomorrow I wake up a bit closer to the man that God would have me become. I'm by no means there yet... and I stub my toes altogether too often on this road... but I'm a little bit closer perhaps, and that is thanks to friends who are encouraging and honest (which isn't always encouraging, but is often necessary anyway) regardless of the short term ramifications.

It's good to have the team back and it's great to be reminded that my host of weaknesses are not the same ones shared by this incredibly gifted team. I only hope (and ask your prayers for) that my strengths are able to help the team as well. God is good and I'm just glad he lets broken people tag along for the ride. 

-Nick

disclaimer: i'm not depressed or in a bad mood at all. In fact i'm quite optimistic about the rest of the summer. So no worrying about me being in a bad place emotionally. Besides even if I was (which i'm not)... normal people are allowed those sometimes, at least that's what I hear. 

Day 22. A little late but still here.

Today was a good day, filled with rest and a little bit of work. Then food and fun and Mcdonalds dip cones... 

The day began in the afternoon. Despite my query on when we should be up and at it in the morning I was strictly forbidden to set an alarm and told that we'd "go out to camp whenever you guys wake up". Well... me and hunter apparently both decided that this was a great opportunity to sleep in so when we slumbered all the way until noon. I can't decide if it's a good thing or not that I'll be allowed to set an alarm even on rest days now...

After we woke up we grabbed some lunch and headed out to camp to do some chores and pick up a few things, but not before hitting mcdonalds for dip cones, I'd say we're getting a bit addicted to those things but that would suggest that it's in any way a bad thing. Just keep in mind if you want to bribe us... dip cones are a good start. Now it was off to camp. Even having been there the day before it once again had gained a bit of distance in memory and my own perception of time. Except this time instead of the melancholy end of a good thing I was ready to do it all over again. I was ready for the noise and chaos to begin anew. Sadly this was not to be so we completed our errands and came back into town. 

we ate an incredible supper of steak, shrimp, deviled eggs, and potato salad and made a few of the leftover gallons of milk from camp into chocolate milk. mmmm chocolate milk... Dinner was fantastic! But in many ways dinner paled in comparison to the great conversations we had after dinner. 

The topic that we've been discussing off and on all summer is vision versus reality. In ministry this is something that we are trying to find the middle ground almost constantly. Our dream is to be more effective and have greater resources to work with in order to do all of the things that we'd like, but the reality is that we've got the resources that we do this summer and we can't produce extra buildings or people right now. 

In some small way we ran into this concept while I was working concrete a few years back, Depending on the foreman that I was working under that day we'd either be operating on the idea that 'lets do the best we are capable of' or the idea of 'that's good enough'. The first required a little more time and effort but yielded far superior results. The second got the job done but occasionally required that we come back and fix mistakes. 

In ministry we also have to consider the fact that our mission isn't to keep the popcorn machine running or the fences looking pretty. Our mission is to minister to kids (and anyone else that comes to camp). And during camp season that mission tends to force us into 'good enough' mode. If our maintenance is good enough that frees us (or someone else) up to be with a kid and make their camp experience the best that it can be. In the same vein when we're prepping in the off season we  should be doing the best we can so that it lasts as long as possible and that it doesn't require our direct attention during camp season because we've got better things to do. 

Also on this subject it helps to think of the camp as basic setup that can be expanded and grown, but it must always be balanced with the fact that God gives us what we need and what we have right now is enough. We've got lots we think would be cool to see and there are tons of incredible dreams and ideas floating around... but ultimately if God ordained that we should do camp with tents and an outhouse I'd still be showing up because the effectiveness of our ministry can be augmented by better facilities but the true impact of what we do is only because God works in us and through us to impact lives. He is the one in charge of it all and we're just trying to be good stewards. 

-Nick

Day 21. Another new experience! and a (hopefully) fun story!

Alrighty, today began fairly well... I dragged myself out of bed and me and hunter foraged about for edible things (we're both bachelors so that's a pretty broad list) ate some breakfast and set to working through the to-do list we had.

The largest and most 'exciting' part of the to-do list was to take the garbage truck to the landfill and dump it. Now... do me a favor, close your eyes and remember back to those surprisingly durable tonka trucks that every kid my age seemed to have at one point. Those little yellow things that seemed to come from the store with half the paint missing and a bit of rust. (or maybe that was just the effect me and my brothers had on em) well... imagine that sort of dump truck. Now imagine that instead of the construction yellow it is painted a dark green, blotched with sun, rain, and who-knows what else... well, thats the truck i'm talking about here. Now fill that truck with the garbage of nearly 3 weeks of camp operations, so much garbage that where the truck dumps there is a little black patch of dead grass because the juices have become toxic. In short this truck might not be toxic enough to make you superhero but it sure might kill ya.

I drove this ancient monstrosity all the way into town, its rumble and creaks just adding a good counterpoint to the constant refrain of "please God let this thing die when zach is driving and not me". (I suspect a similar refrain was uttered in the past and resulted in me driving this thing in the first place). well to make a long story shorter than I might have otherwise, I finally managed to limp this thing into the dump where the scale attendant recognized the truck and helped me get the thing out on the landfill and directed me where to dump it. Now... I like to think i'm not a prideful man (one might even go so far as to say I'm proud of that fact. but if you were that one who would say so you might be a silly man as well) but I do not particularly enjoy learning things by embarrassing myself, granted I don't forget and often can muddle my way through on the kindness of strangers and the grace of God. Today was no exception, turns out I didn't completely remember the directions zach gave me to operate the truck, and even once I figured it out (on my own) the box on the truck wouldn't go all the way back down. The attendant being a very nice small town kinda guy was quite gracious about giving me a hand and we got the truck back into its barely street capable state. From here on out the plan was simple... keep the truck running and keep moving. The truck survived and I learned a few things but it was a (mostly good) stretch there for a bit.

Also yesterday and today we've had a farrier out working on our horses, if you didn't read yesterdays update I encourage you to check it out. Also if you need a farrier in or around cheyenne I recommend the High Plains Farrier Service.

After we finally got our to-do list done me and hunter (the only members of bachelor camp) loaded up and headed into town to crash at a few of our bosses house (we have lots of bosses, it at least helps that they're in married couples though) I'm looking forward to a fun 4th of july! (yeah I didn't forget that I'm a canuck but when in rome...)

Also really looking forward to seeing the rest of the team on thursday evening. it's peculiar how you can go from strangers to family in a few weeks, it'll be stranger still when we have to leave at the end of the summer.

ooh lookie! I got it done with 15 minutes to spare! go me!

-Nick

Day 20. Of horseshoes and decking screws, of facebook, family, and friends.

Today I woke up late... Apparently it's popular to not wake me up on "vacation" days so I slept in a while and missed the start of a new section of deck. (the same started in yesterdays post). By the time I finished breakfast and whatnot I was just in time to get sent down to the horses to help/observe the farrier at work. Due to a few different circumstances our string of horses has been slightly neglected in the area of hoof care until now... But we finally got a farrier to come out and remedy the situation, I spent a large portion of the day observing and swapping stories with dan and was very impressed with his story of how God got ahold of him and how he's tried to model his business after christian principles. It was a great opportunity and dan also mentioned that he'd like to send his kids to camp here! (people who want to send their kids to camp are a great kind of crazy in my book).

After horses I got to see the beauty of a new set of stairs. I'm fairly certain that if the rest of the deck collapsed those stairs would still be standing.

Annnd last but not least after a quick dinner myself and hunter perused the facebooks and fun was had by all. (I encourage you to check out becca's pictures and join the myriad of comment wars raging therin).  Also I got to skype with my wee little sister for a half hour or so.

This is the part of the show where I go off script and such... today I think I'll just outline the script for the next lil bit.

Until thursday I'll be in and around camp and the nearby town of torington. I should have decent cell signal so I'll update those days, thursday night I think we're going camping so I might not have power, internet, or cell signal so I might not be updating in a timely manner those days, I do plan on bringing paper and a pen so at very least I can jot down the core of an update and type it up later. After this week we move on to primary camp in casper for a week, high school camp at table in the wilderness, and a mission trip in denver for a week. All of these times might be intermittent updates but I shall record my recollections and perspective as much as possible.

Kind of a boring day... but they can't all  be winners eh? (p.s. happy day after canada day)

-Nick

Day 19. The day in which I slept... a lot

Today was quite a good Sunday. We went in to church for the late service (I am convinced that only crazy people go to the early one) and heard a solid sermon about Gideon and how at times we're just called to make noise and watch God do the work. OK in all fairness that might not have been exactly what pastor said but it did come up in our discussion later in the day so that's how I remember it.

We then ate some chinese food in Torington and I was quite amused to see how busy it was and how much fun it is when a chinese restaurant is full of cowboys, pretty entertaining.

Came back to camp after lunch and after reading for a short while I fell asleep, I was half awakened to learn that a rattlesnake had made its way into one of the cabins... Don't worry, no one else was here and it was quickly disposed of. Just a bit entertaining and further proof that the two remaining cabin remodels need to happen this year. Despite a small project to do I slept all the way until 6pm (the project still got done thanks to zach and hunter being superstars n whatnot) and finally dragged myself out of bed so that I could fall asleep before monday rolled around.

And finally I'm starting to get into the neighborhood of why I'm telling the whole narrative of the day... Most of it probably isn't interesting to anyone but me, but meh...  anyway, after I awoke we had a mini guys night and watched alien on the projector and ate delicious bowls of cold cereal. The Bachelor experience did not end here we also had a pair of those ever so peculiar banana chairs. It reminded me of watching movies in the basement of our old house on 5th street... (for those that don't know that era, 4 college guys in a house will turn it into a fairly stereotypical bachelor pad... it just happens). It was pretty fun to see the references from prometheus that are also in alien.

Now, as you might recall if you've seen alien... they always seem to be hiding about head height and stick their creepy faces out right when you turn around... well as me and adam were heading down to hook up a trailer we noticed one of the cabin doors were open, we ducked in checked to make sure nothing had set up residence and then turned the lights off and turned around to leave. As I turned toward the door in the now-dark cabin I came face to face with a lil furry face. rower! bowser (one of the other cats here at camp, yes I was a part of his name) greeted me as I did a nice little scared dance. But I had my revenge and set him outside and closed the door, as I drove off down the road he was either plotting... or pouting. I'm hoping for pouting.

well there you have it, except for tossing some hay and whatnot that's a pretty complete account of the day, which usually means now is the time where I pick an obscure and semi-related topic to expound upon. I suppose tonight will be no different.

An empty camp is a strange thing, With just 4 of us remaining here last night (we're up to 7 tonight though) this camp is a huge echoing place. It is alive with memory and tears, with stress and stories. In some ways it's extremely useful to sit around and rest here because in my brain I'm still recalling and learning from things that happened last year. I can still remember with incredible clarity sitting at this very table and talking to a dear friend about the way God works in our lives and how a biblical discussion doesn't have to take place in a little Christianese vacuum. I can still remember ducking out the back door when he inevitably was swept off to dance with his lady (now his wife) and the incredible stars spread out overhead. While I remember this last 2 weeks of camp and prepare for our season on the road I can't remember maverick without remembering abe, or go through a thursday night without remembering deb and nicole. Dear friends all... Yes this is what a calling feels like and this is what success is measured by, NOTHING we did here remained a simple menial task. I love every minute of it including the times I took my boots off and couldn't move for at least an hour because my feet hurt so badly. I love the times when I was so badly sunburned that even though I was sitting in front of an AC unit on full blast I was still roasting hot. Why do I remember those times and am glad? Because in many ways the only thing I've ever been able to accomplish out here is to make noise... and watch God work. May we all be so Blessed wherever we are planted.

-Nick