For those of you who were not aware, last year I was asked to direct a week of camp. This means a host of planning and operational responsibilities dealing with a specific 5 days. I must not have messed it up too bad because they asked me to try it again for a week this year. That week began on the 22nd and technically ended the 27th. But it is no accident that I took until now to update again.
I will admit the best of intentions and thought that just maybe I might be able to update during the week this year... a hope that was quickly dashed Sunday afternoon as my carefully laid plans came crashing down and a series of improvisations began.
In comparison to last year this week was a rousing success. I was more confident in my ability to navigate the schedule and knew much more of what to expect and could take some comfort in the brief moments where I could sit and relax before another issue arose that required my attention. However this week was a study in dramatic contradictions and difficulties.
I had far less support this week than I did last year, both in my superiors time spent at camp and just the raw number of staff present this year. I can't say enough good things about the crew that was there (and I'll touch on a few highlights further on) and I know that many who I asked would have quickly joined us if circumstances were different. Keeping that in mind I've heard it said that "God provides the staff that you need each year" and this year that was true, however I didn't get any extra. To the point that I had to ask some of the staff to take on a disproportionate amount of work and wear multiple hats in order to make things happen smoothly. Two of the gals bore most of this responsibility and my expectation was that they would perform the necessary aspects of both jobs and likely not excel at either, much to my surprise neither were content to just meet the bare minimum and pushed for excellence. This resulted in them both being frustrated and exhausted by the end of the week... but they have every right to be proud of the work they did (and possibly mad at me for asking that much of them).
Secondly we had a few very difficult calls to make this week in regards to discipline. I won't go into a lot of specifics because they're not terribly important, but I do want to go through some of my mental process to shed some light for those who were there, and for those that will likely evaluate my decisions later on in the year. At camp we have a firm conviction that any kid who wants to come to camp should be allowed to, regardless of financial ability or past discipline problems. Many of us came up through camps and other organizations that taught us what Grace meant in a very practical sense and we see that as something we need to pass on to the next generation. A responsibility I completely agree with and take very seriously. However there is a time when justice or discipline must also be considered as the most loving route. This does not cause grace to diminish nor will forgiveness be denied in any way... Sometimes a bad thing is the best option.
I remember talking to a young father not too long ago (I bet he'll recognize himself, but I didn't ask his permission to share this story, hence the anonymity) who was frustrated with the behavior of his son. The man and his wife had planned/prepared a tasty supper for their son as well as a delicious dessert of fresh raspberries (one of the child's favorites) but during the course of the regular meal the young boy decided that he was done eating. He picked up his food and threw it across the room and at his parents. In the boldness that only small (or particularly recalcitrant) children can convincingly muster he looked at his dad and said "raspberries?" The father, not being one to forsake his parental responsibility told his son no. He explained lovingly that the boy had chosen wrongly and his actions had consequences, including the loss of dessert that night. In the same way that the father in this story was frustrated by the responsibility of caring enough to remain consistent and loving while also wanting to give good things to his child I too was stuck in that place with some of the decisions this week. And because unless you're already in the loop this probably seems incredibly vague... Hopefully it'll be helpful for those who walked that road with me. But regardless, I'll move on. (read Proverbs 3:12 on this too)
In what little training we could get done as a group on the weekend, I presented a challenge to the staff. We took on the simple challenge of "Love God, Love others". A profoundly difficult reality, but in my mind a week ago was something that needed to be the core of success. As a matter of fact it seemed to be the only thing that mattered. (something that became more and more true as the week went on, but I'll leave that until part 2) I also got the chance to see 'my' worship leader in action as he led the staff in group worship/prayer sessions in lieu of training due to complications. Despite the behind the scenes chaos I could see and feel the presence of God, and the week hadn't even begun.
Next time on the N-Quadrant. Kids, kids, everywhere! Rain, rain, come again! (all week long) and the shadow of doubt.
Thanks for coming back even when I don't update for a week :)
-Nick
